It seems that once upon a time women were looking for Prince Charming now Prince Charming has a new name... Master/Dom.

B&D / S&M has become trendy and with trendy comes a new group of Dominants and submissives. These are what I refer to as the "do-me" submissives.

I look around the Internet and I see many sites that describe Dominance/Submission as a power exchange of sorts and explains what a good Dominant or Submissive should be. (Honest- trustworthy-safe-strong-truthful-etc) I read this and say this is nothing new or earth shattering, because regardless of the activity all human beings should be acting this way - so what's new.

It is my belief that women have figured out that female submission is a hoax they can use to control Male dominants. I have heard all the reasons why women claim to be submissive and my contention is they are less than truthful. Things like I have a need to please I have these fantasies/desires or I get excited from being controlled.

The truth is very few people practice true B&D/S&M. Instead they are engaging in some diluted form of kinky sexual role-play.

When I ask female submissives why they submit or why they feel they are submissive I usually get answers like "I was born to serve, its in my nature to nurture". "I submit only to my master even though by nature I'm submissive" . It is because of these answers that I feel they cannot truthfully answer the question.

This is why I firmly believe that female submissives are "do-me" submissives. They have developed an understanding, they are the ones actually in control and use this to feed the male ego. All women want attention. They want to cherished, taken care of, sexually fulfilled by a knight in shining Armour (even if it is same sex knight). And all people have fantasies not just submissives.

If most women were honest about why they submit, they would tell you it's for selfish reasons. What I see happening here is a new sexual revolution, where women have chosen to say they are submissive in order to get their wants/needs/desires fulfilled. Those wants/needs/desires being the same as they were when DS wasn't so popular. (Orgasms, being cared for, attention and the power to control their significant other) But now as a submissive it is required that you tell your Master every thought in your head and nothing is sacred therefore the relationship becomes more open. Thus sex can be more like the submissive imagines it to be. So if you have thoughts of being ravished it is perfectly ok to state that as so. (eg) Maybe you have to do the laundry to have your fantasy fulfilled but hey you'd have to do laundry anyway.

Well if you think about it lots of "vanilla" people would be considered submissives as well if that was all there was to submission. I think all women want good sex and to be taken in ways that relieves guilt(not exclusive to submissives) and of course women want attention which they may or may not get as women but lead on a leash and undressed they get as a submissive.

This writer believes the superior sex has figured out how to get what they want and need by feeding the male ego and renaming the relationships Master/slave dominant/submissive . I am no longer the girlfriend/wife or significant other I am his submissive!

There are two schools of thought concerning S&M / B&D commonly in existence at this time. They may not always be vocalized but in fact they do exist. The first school of thought is that fetish role scene play (synonym for S&M / B&D) is fore play for sexual intercourse or sexually related activities, including male or female masturbation or other direct forms of physical contacts. (For those who are getting lost blow jobs pussy eating or what ever.) This form of scene play is usually limited in practice to couples that are intimately involved with each other. Of course it can include more than two people - in some cases it just makes it more fun. The one thread that runs through this school of thought is that scene play is to end mainly in intercourse or some other form of intimate sexual activity.

The other school of thought has been referred to as "Old Guard, "Old Leather," scene play, strict domination or submission. This school has a relatively rigid set of guidelines for relationships between dominants and sub missives. The roles of sub missives, slaves, etc are definitely defined There are standards of acceptance of what is or is not S&M / B&D. The two schools usually are not found to agree on much of anything for one main reason. The first school of thought is based upon a Swan Dance type of scene ending in intimate sexual activities.

The second school usually rules out any form of sexual activity on the part of the players. It is considered to be "Alternative Forms Of Adult Sexual Stimulation." People included in this school may be masochists, fetishists who have different sexual partners than their play partners, those into controlling others and those who are into being controlled by others. This school has an entirely different mind set from the other school. Example, a Master or a Domina can play with many diverse people in many different role plays, and have a separate sex partner who may or may not be involved in fetish scene role play. It is perfectly acceptable for a woman to do several different types of role plays with different men or women etc. without any sexual contact as it is perceived in the first school of thought.

Let's expand, define, examine, and discuss the first school of thought at some length. The idea of fetish - role- play as a form of fore play for intimate sexual relationships, would expect to find husbands, wives, boyfriends, and girl friends engaging in this type of activity to heighten sexual experiences. A very pretty dominant lady told me recently that nothing makes her cum more during sex than to have her toes in her lover's mouth while they are actually having sex. Now this is taking foot fetish to its ultimate heights. Now other couples like to spank each other or one becomes the spanker or the spanked depending upon who is dominant or submissive. This could in fact be taken, as a scene going back to child hood or just turns them on it is not important. At this level there really isn't much dominance or sub mission taking place on any more than a sexual level.

The situation starts to develop some difficulties when it takes on the forms of true dominance and true submission.. Now the very nature of dominance means that the choices of what is going to happen usually rest with the dominant individual. The males referring to their female partners as collared slaves have relationship where everything is available on demand, especially sex. These ladies represent themselves as living only to please their master. Being with him only to serve him in any way he wishes them to, without any regard for their feelings on the matter.

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