|HYPNOSIS, A BRIDGE TO THE SUBMISSIVE SOUL|
HYPNOSIS, A BRIDGE TO THE SUBMISSIVE SOUL
As many of us already know the BDSM scene is mainly mental; capture the mind, and the body will indeed follow. Whatever other activities follow this mental exchange or TPE (Total Power Exchange) are simply the gravy of the exchange. But as I have come to learn, there are things in our daily lives or our life experiences that are blocking our way in reaching down deep into our core, our souls if you will, to allow this exchange to happen. We come away from any scene unfulfilled, and we become stuck emotionally. You might ask, so how can I go about breaking through to that core feeling?Is it a matter of the Dominant just ordering the submissive to do as they say, and the submissive being forced to do something that his or her mind just may not be ready to do? How can we go about bridging this emotional divide?Well thanks to my submissive husband we found one way of doing this. We have learned to use a tool called hypnosis.
I know some of you are saying that this is all quackery. Your thoughts are of stage performers making their subjects do ridiculous things, or they go to deep mystical religious practices that your mind just can't grasp. I too thought some of these things until just recently. It's my nature to be somewhat of a "doubting Thomas". I probably was a citizen of Missouri, the 'show me' state, in a previous lifetime! Okay, so I reached a bit withthat one referring to regressive hypnotherapy...smile.
I am surprised that in all my years within the scene, using hypnotherapy has not been widely spoken about as a tool for many to use. In my opinion now, this can be the most powerful and enjoyable tool to use. It has long been accepted that the brain is the body's main sex organ; so, why not use an effective tool to enhanceit? To me, hypnosis is like a bulldozer pushing away life's distractions, allowing the Dominant to reach thesubmissive's subconscious by using trigger words or phrases. Hypnotherapy is very powerful and it must also follow the rules of safe, sane and consensual when using it. Some of you also might say this tool can be very dangerous if used unwisely.Hypnotism cannot be used against someone's will, but it is important to note that it is paramount that you have complete trust in the partner using it, so I use the disclaimer that hypnotherapy should only be used by consenting adults who truly wish this for both concerned. When my husband first brought this up about a week ago, I confess I was skeptical.I thought it would be a form of phone sex. He found an online Mistress who practices this form of Eriksonian hypnotherapy to help those that need it. She does sessions either online, by phone, or by in-person appointments. I will give out her Internet website address and information about Eriksonian hypnotherapy at the close of this article, so you can judge whether or not it is for you.
This particular Mistress has an online questionnaire for you to fill out, so that she can best determine what you are looking for, so my husband and I both did.It was detailed and specific.After filling out the questionnaire I became more intrigued but still being my ever-skeptical self, I spoke briefly with her before our scheduled appointment this past Saturday night.Even I felt my subconscious being drawn in. I decided to open my mind to this and allow what was to happen take its natural course.
To step back a minute, the reason both my husband and I tried this is that we both wanted something to enhance our D/srelationship. We're your everyday normal couple (well not too normal! Laugh!) who had become 'stuck' due to the demands of everyday life and wanted to search for something to help us along. Now, I am glad that he took the initiative and did this for us! I see it bringing us both immense pleasures in the future, him in realizing his submission and I in realizing my Dominant side, and it already has the day after! I have used a trigger phrase to reach him and without hesitancy, he has been there. I can also see using hypnotism very wickedly in the future, but for that to happen he needs more sessions with her, and she needs to teach me how to use this effective tool. In fact I am so impressed, that I am even thinking of taking a course in becoming a trained hypnotist myself, for I see it as a way of helping people, be it in theD/s realm or vanilla. But I'm getting ahead of myself.Let me briefly describe to you all what I witnessed that night.
Honestly, I thought it was going to be boring. Me just watching him go under and with my skepticism in place, I thought nothing was going to happen. I thought I would just be sitting there listening to his conversation with her.I was dead wrong and happily so! I spoke with her first, reiterating what I was looking for in using this new tool.I told her that I saw it as a bridge to another person's soul or subconscious desires. She agreed. I then handed the phone off to my husband, got comfy, he did as well, and I sat quietly listening to a one-sided discussion. (I will have him give his account of his experience as well within this article.)
Within this experience, leather has no place. All that is needed is just your mind totally focused and ready for release.At first they were having what I would say a cordial yet friendly discussion of his past experiences within D/s and in life itself. I was looking around, at him, lighting a cigarette, and drinking coffee. It was then I noticed he got very quiet, his eyes closed and he continued to say,"yes, yes, yes." His body seemed to relax, and his head drooped. His face went completely relaxed and very blank. My mouth hung open! I was witnessing for the first time in my life, a person going under hypnosis! I sat frozen and watched intently what washappening. It was amazing to me! As I am writing this article, I am still amazed. He then opened his eyes, and started talking about what they were originally talking about. Like he picked up the conversation from where it first left off. Again, I was amazed. He then went under again, and started saying, "I will obey". I felt excited at this moment, almost like I was drawing power from their exchange!
Again his body slumped, head down and eyesclosed. Then he said, "I will obey Mistress Mary, I want to obey Mistress Mary, I need to obey MistressMary" over and over. At that point he awoke and came out of it. The phone was turned over to me and Mistress Linda and I discussed what just happened. I could tell something was now different with my husband. She gave me a trigger phrase to try out and told me to give him a command in a certain tone after that. I did so immediately; I told him to get onthe floor in a fetal position and suck his thumb and without moments hesitancy he did this for me! I praised him for doing so! I relayed this back toMistress Linda and we proceeded to talk more about how to handle my husband. I then handed the phone back to him, and she took him under a third and final time. There is so much to discuss about what transpired but after last night, suffice it to say I am now a believer in this technique! My husband will be going under more times with Mistress Linda and of course I will be present for further sessions to take his mind on this wonderful journey! After his session with her we talked for hours and opened up to each other of our feelings of what just took place. We were energized beyond belief. The dear boy loves to masturbate in the morning. I used the trigger phrase on him commanding him to throw out the lube he normally uses and he did it! He just got up and did what I said. What he felt was excitement in doing so. Again, I will have him write of his experiences before, during and after.Even now the day after, I have used the phrase to help reinforce the experience and get his mind conditioned and without hesitation, he has obeyed each time. Again he did so with the feeling of subtle excitement and fulfillment.According to Mistress Linda, I must keep conditioning his mind to the trigger phrase daily, and with more phrases to come...smile. Now I will turn over the keys to my husbandfor him to relay to all of you his experience with this most marvelous of tools. It is my hope that you will find this technique helpful and useful too!
(Mysubmissive husband's view)
Mistress has done a marvelous job of describing the experiences of that night! Please allow me to fill in the remaining pieces for those interested... I had the opportunity to observe hypnotism during a psych course in college, so while I was not a skeptic regarding its capabilities, I now know I had some misunderstandings of it.
I had imagined a trance to be an almost 'zombie'-like state or at least a complete unconsciousness that I would awake from saying, 'What did I do?' It was not like that at all, (Though Mistress Linda tells me such a state is possible) but rather more like that state you find yourself in as you're drifting off to sleep. I'd say it was most akin to the mental sensation of daydreaming, when you find yourself just staring off into space, your mind not particularly focused on anything. I honestly felt I could have broken the trance at any moment but I didn't want to, because it was such a pleasant and relaxing sensation! It is such a subtle sensation that even in the face of all the evidence, I still am not completely convinced I was in a trance! My mind was more blank than can ever recall with none of those mental little sidebars your mind is constantly undertaking during waking hours... You know the ones?The only thoughts I had where the ones coming from the voice on the other end of the phone. Each sentence she spoke was absorbed, and I say absorbed because in my (almost) normal mental state when I listen to someone, I'm usually 2 sentences ahead in the conversation, thinking of corollaries or arguments for or against their words and in general, analyzing everything they're saying to me. In this case, there was none of that. Whatever she was saying just was! I just listened and absorbed it all. Unbeknownst to me, Mistress Linda and Mistress Mary had discussed a sign to indicate my tranced state... I would crawl to Her and beg to kiss her hand. When the suggestion was planted and I was being brought out of the first trance, I recall a moment of confusion, thinking, "Does she want me to do this as soon as She reaches the count of one or when she tells me to?" And the moment she reached one, the confusion disappeared! I knew instinctively what I was to do and without another word, I set the phone down and immediately crawled to Mistress, begging for her hand to kiss! The need to do it was automatic!
Although I don't recall verbatim Mistress Linda's words during the trance now, I did immediately afterwards. She had told me during the trance that I could forget whatever I wanted to or not about what she had said and I recalled everything.
To paraphrase the experience, she focused on the emotions from a pleasurable D/s experience I had told her about before hand and as she suggested to me that I wanted and needed to obey, she linked those words with remembering and re-feeling the pleasure of that experience...creating a link in effect between obeying and pleasure. It was not so evident to me at that moment what the effect of this linking was to become. The effect was upon hearing Mistress speak her trigger words; I immediately felt an emotional 'welling up' inside me... an eagerness to know what she wants and a desire to do it if I can. Let me emphasize, 'if I can', because I am aware even after she triggers my response, that I won't do just anything and I feel and know I can refuse, but I also sense I will be a bit emotionally conflicted if I have to say no, because I really, really want to obey her!
The amazing thing that I didn't expect and that I'm still trying to come to grips with is the subtlety of the emotion. Her trigger is not a command at all, nor do I feel 'compelled' in any way to obey it, but rather I feel the emotion of wanting to. It all comes completely from inside ME, rather than feeling it is being forced or lead by an outside influence. Let me regress a bit and say that I have always thought Mistress to be very, very sexy and I already adore Her completely but as she said earlier here, sometimes the day-to-day stuff would cloud that and I couldn't get in touch with my submissive lust for her! The feeling was very frustrating for both of us and admittedly, sometimes I almost wanted to cry over the fact I wanted to submit to Her, but just couldn't reach into myself and get back to that mindset! I also suffer from a nasty 'topping from the bottom' attitude at times and get pushy and demanding in my submission, wanting what I want from it all rather than to just obey. This was another topic we had asked Mistress Linda to address. Forgive me for saying Mistress, but I am much more comfortable with words and when I choose, can debate circles around Mistress and have often found myself debating myself right out of what could have been a very pleasurable scene!
Mistress Linda reinforced a sense in me that Mistress Mary is always right. Whatever she tells me is the truth. Now while I confess in my after-trance state I know this isn't true, I do find less of a need to debate Her and when she speaks, I really, really want to pay attention to Her every word. That is not to say I will loose me ability to think around Her, but I'm certain over time I will become more and more inclined to accept what she says without arguing the point at every turn. Of particular note is that when she does command me now, I have no sense of a mental debate in my mind like I have in the past. Her words reach me clearly and without any 'knee-jerk' second-guessing or interpretation on my part. Although I could write a book on this experience, I fear I've gone on too long already. If you really are interested in knowing more about how I felt, please feel free to e-mail me and I'd love to chat more with you! Let me just add a few final points here;
Whether the effects of being hypnotized turnout to be long-lasting or not, it has certainly taught me how flexible my mind really is and how easy change for the better can be. It has leaded me to renew my vows of improving my health and working towards self-improvement in the future. Lastly, the few Mistresses I've ever discussed hypnosis with have balked at it because they "want submission to them to be given freely, without the need to brainwash the sub." Please let me tell you nothing could be further from the truth! One, if the sub has freely chosen to submit to hypnosis for you, then isn't it already of free choice?And two, it does not have to be bra inwashing. In my opinion far from it. It can allow him/her to make a connection to a deep emotional need they already have inside them and come away more satisfied in their submission every time they get a chance to serve you! If they really aren't submissive to you already trust me, you're both wasting your time because it will have no effect. But if it is their nature you will both find it an amazing, wonderful enhancement to the bond you already share!
Very best of love, luck and happiness to you all,
Fiesty and submissivromance
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